Just Me: The Kratik Malhotra Blog

Home…well, I guess that’s what the Art of Living ashram in Bangalore does to you. I knew it was a home at the first instant; I don’t know how, I just knew it the moment when I saw the top of Vishalakshi Mantap (VM) from the taxi as I hit 21st km kanakapura road for the first time. In fact, from there on in, every time that I would make a trip to the ashram, seeing VM from the bus before entering the International center of the Art of Living would make my eyes wet. My heart would start pumping faster and I would feel like I am on the brink of something incredible. It felt like a wish was coming true and trust me, it happened every single time. It was amazing and something that I could never comprehend, but I guess that’s what happens when you are right outside of your home.

Ashram was a place where everyone was welcomed, accepted and celebrated, where every being was spiritual (and I am not talking about only humans), where everybody smiled for absolutely no reason, where the energy was so strong that you could rise in love with anybody at any time, and where it seemed like you already knew all the people whom you had just met. Time, space, energy, beings and their spirits, nature, universe and God…in the ashram, all those felt connected. It’s a connection that – probably – only silence and grace can make you experience and having not been in silence for over three years, at a personal level, I believe my connection with the self and the divine needs be strengthened again.

So, here I go again, wearing a huge smile on my face and singing Jai Gurudev! Over the years, Guruji and his knowledge has taken me to places. From my experience, one thing that I have learned is to trust the process and enjoy the journey.  You know, about three years ago, when I was a student at the Florida State University, I could never save enough money to afford an advance course. So, I took a sankalpa of doing an advance course once I save enough money and three years on…boom! Now that I have done that, it feels very special. Even though it’s my sixth and I won’t be doing it in the ashram, or going to the ashram doing satsangs in the train with hundreds of fellow volunteers, I believe this Art of Silence course it’s going to be the most special one yet. I just know it.

(Hult International Business School, Course Location)

Times are different, circumstances are different, I have even grown up a tad bit, but one thing still remains the same: the thought of me doing an advance course still makes me feel like there is magic in the air. I do feel it in my fingers and I absolutely feel it in my toes; Guru grace is all around me and the feeling grows…I feel like my spirit is dancing. It’s special, it’s magic and in Boston, I AM GOING HOME.

And then, I have come across people who are pleased, even though they don’t have as much as the people mentioned above. Who are these people? What do they do? They are the strong, independent and willing souls that have landed on this planet as a result of God’s creation, and in them they are heroes who not only smile, they in fact, conquer and from within, they conjure glory.

I was more like first ones.

Couple of years ago, round about this time year, I was working for probably the biggest sports analysis company in Asia as a soccer analyst, the world’s most read soccer website as a soccer journalist and the most well managed professional soccer club in India as a soccer marketer, but I can say, I am doing  better now. Working in marketing and sales, we had to sell tickets and get people for our soccer games. Having volunteered for almost three years as a social activist, I remember approaching this non-profit organization that took responsibility for teaching rural kids in India. As a club employee, I had these students come to the stadiums to watch our club games for free. It all worked out well and the kids made it in time for the East Bengal game, which in fact, was one of our first few games of the season.

The head personnel for the organization’s Pune branch, Arhaan, got about one hundred kids to the stadium and having spoken to my boss, I made sure that the kids made it to the sidelines as the players walked out for warm-up, only to be later seated in the VIP section. As the little rural children, who were dressed in their uniforms, got to the sidelines, their excitement was unbelievable. Some shook the hands of the players as they were walking out on to the fields, some shouted out their names and some whispered, “Hey, look at their leg muscles…oooh,” or, “This is the first time I have ever met a football player!”

As the game went on, they made the maximum noise and chanted the PFC theme, “Who are we? PFC!” It was great to see them have an experience of a life-time. The entire incident shook me and made me realize that it’s these moments that people remember. You are not going to remember if you ever failed in a test 36 years on, but what you will remember is meeting a football player who appears in the newspaper the very next day.

After the game, Arhaan thanked me and the club for everything we had done for their organization’s kids. As I was walking towards the parking, just seeing the look on each student’s face, I couldn’t stop smiling and later, I went to Arhaan and I asked him what I had resisted for a long time. I questioned, “So, are these kids really happy?” After which, he looked at me in confused manner and said, “You know, our kids are always happy, but today was definitely something special.”

They come to school because they love to and because they want to learn. They really love to learn. Unlike most kids, who are forced to go to school, they have an easier option: they can work in restaurants to support their family, but instead, they come to us because they want to learn. They too have big dreams.”

That moment was the moment when everything started to seem very different. Who were those kids? Well, they certainly are born in the richest of families. In fact, their families can’t even afford to pay for school, but they still go to schools because they want to learn and such non-profit organizations do a fantastic job in making sure that these kids get everything from books, to pens, to uniforms. Most of us are blessed enough to be born if upper/lower middle-class/rich families, but we are always not happy for something or the other, whereas, kids from lower financial backgrounds love everything that life gives them and their respect for it is insurmountable. It was a real eye-opener for me.

An year later, sometime in late-November/early-December, I was in Atlanta and visiting a homage for mentally infirm people. It was like being in Forest Gump or Koi Mil Gaya but only ten times of that. It was a scary but a very pleasant experience. Imagine yourself being surrounded by people who have been left at the centers by their families, who don’t know where they are at and why are they there, who don’t know what they are doing and on top of it, who have a misconception of who they are.

Maybe they live though a child in them or maybe they live their past over and over again…I don’t know, but one thing that could easily be inferred was the fact that they were all childlike and not childish. Their smiles, their joy, their excitement and their love for us was astonishing. I remember when one women from the mentally infirm home called me to her side and told me to stay safe, and also, blessed me to stay happy. I couldn’t believe it. In spirituality we talk of a ‘shift’, which refers to the shift in the thought process and it was exactly that. I don’t know what has happened to me since then. When I want to cry, I cry; when I want to laugh, I laugh, but I make sure that I celebrate life every moment like they do.

                                         

Those people…they were playful and joyful, (you talk of a girl dumping you, these people were dumped by their families to rotten) and also knew that life is difficult, but by then, they had also realized that every moment deserves to be celebrated. For me, it was even tough to imagine where they were and what each of them had gone through, but the startling thing about them was that they all were happy, and loved our company. It was a massive, massive shift for me.

You know, you must take a little time out of your lives and go and visit the homeless shelters because you must meet them. You must meet these people. They will teach you a lesson. Small worries of your life would disappear and dissolve, and like them, even if a little thing brings you happiness, you will celebrate it as if it is your salvation. Moreover, you will be grateful to God for what you have got.

In this post, I have talked of rural kids and mentally infirm people, but there are thousands out there waiting for you to visit them. Take your first foot forward. Visit these people, who live in this moment; that moment which passes as you snap your fingers. They aren’t the Jordons or Will Smiths of this world, but what they do, they turn into Morgan Freemans and Rajnikants because deep down they know, “Every single time that you are challenged, God wants you to come out as a hero.”

To me, I take my inspiration from these people: people who don’t have as much as others but their belief, strength faith and smile carries them past every single day.

"When you have done everything possible possible, He makes the impossible possible." – Dinesh Ghodke

Love,

Kratik

I still remember getting onto the plane in Paris, boarding a flight to Cincinnati to get to the United States, having a heart filled with enthusiasm, an adrenalin gushing through the veins and a smile sparkling with chime written all over my face. As I left home, I described it as a voyage, and one that was to be my greatest adventure and the toughest challenge that I ever would see. I had two choices right in front of me. Either I could have done things that most do - concentrate on my ‘primary’ objective, or I could have done stuff that people had written me off for. Being me: Naïve but natural, dreamer but determined, silly but happy, perpetually confused but peculiarly peaceful, and hardly religious but deeply spiritual, I couldn’t have gone for the former.

Moreover, having been blessed by Sri Sri Ravishankarji (Guruji), and having been told by Dinesh (Ghodke) Bhaiya, “When you have done everything possibly possible, He makes the Impossible possible,” I was too determined to hold back, only looking for a chance to prove people wrong. I wanted to be an example to every Indian kid growing up, who had ever dared to dream, and was sick and tired of the 'engineering' monotony. So, I built my ship and got ready mentally to set sail in order to eventually stop at Manchester United.

As I landed in Cincinnati, it was exactly how I had imagined it to be, maybe even better. I had to pinch myself for a second and tell the little boy inside of me, “Heck yeah, I am in America!” I had left India on a positive note: as a good – and not a gossip – soccer journalist, as a decent soccer marketer and a pretty-good soccer analyst. I remember my last couple of days in India well and especially that one incident when I went up to Khalid Jamil, one of the finest Indian soccer coaches, to tell him that I would be moving to US to pursue a two year Masters’ course in Sports Management. Listening to which he replied, “Toh fir idhar aa ke kaam karna”, which translates to ‘come back to India to work’. Moreover, he had patted me on the back to say, “Mehnat karna, tu accha karega.” Translating to, ‘work hard, you will do well’.

Getting such comments from a man whom I had an enormous respect for was like a blessing, making me swim (and not drown) in my own tears of sheer gratitude. In fact, I still get shivers as I think about that meeting and his words. Some things are absolutely incredible and unforgettable. Taking his words like his blessing, I had become stronger deep inside. In school and in college, I had failed only to get up, prove my worth and win, and although I knew it was going to be tough, I wasn’t worried.

 “There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.” - Paulo Coelho

My primary aim as I started with my Masters’ program at the Florida State University was to find a place to work on campus and after hearing that I could deal in soccer technology, FSU Seminole soccer did not hesitate even once before presenting me with an opportunity to work for the team and analyze their soccer games. I thank the coaches for that. They were brilliant to me.

As soccer rolled, Finnegan's followed and watching English Premier League on the weekends with soccer fans became an attraction. Soon, occasional parties followed and FSU life had started to set in. I still remember my first party at Stetson's at the end of which I promised myself to never party again. I was hit by a massive thunderstorm named 'culture shock'. I had seen it all in movies but seeing it first hand was different. I was so moved back then, but now, I can look at the entire incident and laugh my heart out. It was classic international student moment! How I sat in a corner and said, "No, no, no! This is wrong!" Hahahahaha!

But what was the ‘impossible dream’? It wasn’t working for FSU Soccer, was it? No, it wasn’t. The impossible dream was to live like how I was living like in India, but even better. It was to inspire people, gain love and most importantly, make the most of my ability, learn more than I could and become the best of me. In short, in Guruji’s words, I wanted to “walk with feet light but leave my footprints behind.” In spiritual terms, I didn’t know how to do it but I had an ‘intention’, and it worked out superbly well.

“Every noble work is at first impossible.” - Thomas Carlyle

I got a teaching assistantship wherein I inspired people. To be true, I taught an introductory Art of Living course and they loved it. Now, obviously, I couldn’t teach an Art of Living course. Smiling relentlessly and talking about the small problems in life, and teaching students how to smile through them was my objective. I believe, I did a decent job at it. Well, at least, some of the testimonials and course evaluations suggest the same.

Personally, teaching as a part of my TA was not enough and I wanted to contribute more, so, I decided on teaching stress-relief programs to some very special people who needed it the most: the homeless. What an experience that was. I remember leading them through their first meditation (yog nidra) and after seeing them come out of the practice, they were smiling like I had never seen them smile. It was out of this world. I cannot describe it. It was extraordinary. It’s moments like those that I feel so proud and grateful to God for having me learn, understand and experience spirituality. Really, what’s better than teaching people to relieve their stress on freewill, believe in themselves, feel lighter and stationing a smile on their face? Nothing, ask me.

“It’s kind of fun to do the impossible.” - Walt Disney

I went on to work in performance analysis and sponsorship for IMG Academy (click to read how it was a dream come true) with some of the biggest names in American sport. Later, I became one of the only handful fewpeople in the world to get featured on the Catapult Sports, a technology that I learned at IMG, website. I also got a chance to speak through Skype in my very own class. Now, I am back in Tallahassee and I am working with FSU Seminoles Football in performance analysis on Catapult at the Florida State University. With only a month left for the season to start, watch us becoming national champions this year. Watch us play at Doak and see how we tear past oppositions to lift the championship.

On the way, I met some wonderful people and who loved me more than I could ever imagine. They called me a friend, a brother and a mate. I have the best friends ever!

All I wanted was a shot at the sports industry abroad and at times, even I have to shake myself to see where I am. It’s not NY Yankess, but had you offered it a year ago, I would have taken it without thinking and had you told me I would be here five years ago, I would have called you one out of your sense. However, on the other hand, it’s only a fraction of where I want to be. My dream is Manchester United and is still a distance away, but – in Dinesh Bhaiya’s words – I am doing everything possible to make the impossible dream possible. Every morning that I wake up, I smile, I feel grateful and I say to myself, “Let’s win it!” before going to work. It’s a divine feeling, believe me.

Friends, opportunity, confidence, love, knowledge, exposure, skills and an experience of a lifetime, a miraculous journey, the Florida State University has given me more than what I could have asked for.

Today is my graduation. I am a student today, I will be an Alumni tomorrow, but a Nole for the rest of my life.

I thank God for everything as it’s him for who I am and where I have reached. It’s Him due to whom that a little Indian boy, who came with massive aspirations, to America can now write a blogpost describing how he is living his dream under the sun and is on the path to get to his dream destination, Manchester United. Getting to Manchester United may seem like a miracle, but I rely on miracles, don't I? Yes, I do.

The watch in the examination hall read 17:25 as I could feel the adrenalin gushing through my veins. They were those five minutes which would signal the end of the my third year second semester electronics engineering examination, and see me leave for the Bangalore Ashram for the first time. In spite of all that fluster of being in an exam, I couldn’t help but smile and feel excited, even though I was not having the easiest time answering the question set.

I scribbled whatever I could in the final few moments, and then, as the bell rang, I punched my fist in the air and shouted, ‘Yes!’ I still remember running out of the class like I had won gold in the Olympics, with hundreds of eyes staring at me in amazement - they must have thought, ‘What’s up with him? What did he write in such a paper?’

I came out of the hall; I smiled, jumped, picked up my bag and galloped to the campus road where my car driver was waiting for me. With the bus due to leave at 6:00PM and my college 20 kms away, I knew I didn’t have much time, so, told my driver him put his foot through the accelerator.

Just to note, even prior to my final exam, Guru stories had already started happening. I really wanted to do the Advance course in the Bangalore Ashram. Well, I had heard so much about it - the Ashram, the course, and everything related; I just wanted to do it, and even though I was told that the reporting for the course was on June 3, 2009 (the same day that my exams were supposed to end), my sankalpa was very strong.

One of the Pune teachers had spoken about me and five others, who so wanted to do the course but couldn’t as our exams were to end the same day. The YES!+ teacher from Pune, was told ‘No’ upfront, but somehow, things just fell in place and we were permitted to join from the next day morning. We would probably be the first and the last participants ever in the history of the Art Of Living to have been given such a privilege, but I guess our reason was genuine and our willingness to attend the workshop, absolutely immense.

Back to June 3, 2009, the day when we were to leave. I changed my dress on the way, picked my Mummi up from her office on my way back from college and reached the bus station. I gave my Mummi a hug as she left for home and as I entered the bus station.

Guess what, I see a smiling Rutuja (who was in Cummins College) running towards me and saying, “What an awesome paper!” I went like, “Really?”

She remarked, “It was great, only problems (She meant numericals)”

And I looking in disbelief said, “Yes, only problems (like real problems in the exam)”

We waited and waited, and the bus which was to leave at 6:00, left at 8:00PM. In the bus, it was me, the teacher - Shashank Ombhase, Varsha Anandani, Rutuja, Sharvari Patil and Annirudh Khurade. Guru stories, Ashram stories, Bawa-Dinesh stories were shared as my excitement grew more and more. I would be wrong if I say it wasn’t fun, it sure was! As it had been exam time, I hadn’t been sleeping properly; four-five hours of sleep was enough to go and write the exam, and so, I wanted to sleep properly is the bus.

Guru showed his magic again. The bus that we were travelling in, had a capacity of about 60, but had only 25 passengers travelling. So, each of us, took two seats each, made ourselves comfortable and went to the Ashram sleeping.

The advance course went on and I learned so much. I also made so many friends, including Kalpak Gandhi, who is such a dear friend to me now. Silence was incredible, and I did meet Guruji too J That meeting was so so special.

He smiled and replied, “First finish engineering and then, think of doing anything else.”

I exclaimed, “My parents think I should do MBA”

He gave me an expression so as to say, “No.” He then, blessed me, and all I can say is that life has been a blessing since.

Seven days after returning to Pune, I was writing for the Indian Express as a sports journalist. Later, I not only went on to head the content writing section for the Maharashtra Premier League (cricket) website but also, write for the biggest football website in the world, Goal.com (interviewing the likes of Morten Gamst Pedersen, Ryan Nelsen, Steve Kean, Jason Roberts, Michel Salgado, and many more). I also worked as a sports analyst for a Singapore based company, Real Time Sportscast and as a marketing trainee for one of the premier football clubs in India, Pune FC.

(Me and Michel Salgado)

The advance course in June 2009 was my first, and I enjoyed it so much that I went on to do four more. With Guruji set to be in Canada for his birthday this year, I so want to go, but with me still to apply for the Canadian Visa and arrange for the ticket expense, it sort of looks improbable. However, just like for my first advance course, my sankalpa is still as strong or maybe, even stronger

Even thinking of being in the Ashram gives me Goosebumps, but whether in Montreal or in Bangalore, I know I am meeting him soon. Ashram is a special place and meeting Him is a special experience. If you haven’t been there, you must go there. It’s not ‘almost heaven’, it is heaven J

Take me home, Ashram roads,

To the place, where I belong, Bangalore Ashram,

Oh my Guru, take me home.

Ashram Roads J

Jai Gurudev J

Love J

Kratik

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