Just Me: The Kratik Malhotra Blog

In the past eighteen days, I have been to two cities, met hundreds of people, made plenty of new friends, learned what’s smiling again and most importantly, realized the fact that the connection which once was, will always be.

When I was a student, I had promised myself that once I start earning and can afford to do an Art of Living Advance/Silence course, I would go ahead and do it. Well, by April 2015, I had been earning for almost an year and two months, but for some reason, I had kept on postponing myself in taking the program. Either I felt that it wasn’t time then or I was trying to save money, or maybe I had accepted straight up that I only have to be good at my job and not brilliantly rounded. Irrespective of the reason, I was a dumbass.

…and then, something magical happened: I got my tax refund!

It was one of those times, when you think, “Okay, what do I want to do the most with this money?” In Robin Van Persie’s words, the little boy inside of me said, “Get your backside to an Art of Living Silence course.” However, there were still doubts in my mind when I realized how much the travel and course would cost, so, I told my mind to ‘shut up and go to bed’ as I started looking through the list of courses all around the United States. I soon came across a magical name, Michael Fischman. Michael, the famous author, was teaching a course in Boston and having heard so much about him, there was no way I could have not registered for the program.

Knowing how fragile my mind is, I booked my flight tickets in no time as I told myself, “Flights are non-refundable, boy! You can’t get out of this now!” It felt like I had won over my mind, at least for that moment. Soon, I registered for the silence program with Michael and left for Boston a couple of weeks on.

My silence was incredible. It was my sixth Art of Silence course but the first one in which I cried during silence. There were too many realizations, too many lessons, too much knowledge and a massive amount of gratitude for everything that I had received. It was the first time that I saw my mind getting cleansed, little by little. It was like watching the negative impressions that were stuck on my mind getting removed and being winded away. It was fantastic.

("It Is Time" - Rafiki)

By the end of the advance course, my smile was back. It just felt like everything was perfect and trust me when I say this, there was hardly a negative thought in my head. It felt like home coming from a spiritual standpoint. It felt like He was saying, “It is time!” (In Rafiki’s voice from Lionking). It's fine if you call me insane.

A couple of weeks on, Guruji, Sri Sri Ravishankar-ji, was coming to Boone, NC and a friend of mine, whom I had met the evening before we played the Hurricanes in Miami in Novemeber, asked me if I would like to drive with her up the mountains from Florida. I paused for a second and then replied, “Duh!” I mean, I could have said all the duhs and dahs, and acted like it wasn’t a big deal but in truth, I couldn’t believe that I was actually going to meet Him. It was like magic. I mean, after the advance course, I felt like He had said, “It is time!” and then, I was going to see Him. It was miraculous.

She picked me up from Jacksonville and we were off to Boone doing satsang on the way. At times, that satsang even had Ricky Martin, Enrique Iglesias and Backstreet Boys making special appearances! To all the girls reading this, I am still straight…just saying! We shared so many Guru Stories that even her car would have felt grateful.

Few hours on and here we were - on top of the mountains - at the Art of Living Retreat Center. As we were entering the Boone Ashram, I yelled out, “I am home!”

It was phenomenal. I just couldn’t stop smiling. Actually, I realized that it wasn’t only me; everybody was smiling. For some reason, everyone was just so happy. It wasn’t Bangalore but it was divine. Guruji was leading a knowledge series, and I and her waited for him to get done and come out of the meditation hall. When I saw Him, I just couldn’t believe my eyes. He was in front of me but I didn’t lose my sense. An Art of Living teacher from Mumbai had once told me that His rate of motion is directly proportional to your excitement, so, I was to be as calm as possible.

I started walking behind him and on the way to his kutir when he turned around and said, “Hi” to me, waving his hand. I smiled as wide as I possibly could. I mean he had never said ‘hi’ to me in such a fashion. It was awesome. From then on in, we followed him around wherever he went and I asked/told him one of the things that I wanted to tell him, partially.

Popping In From The Right Corner

The next day, it so happened that I had received permissions to go inside his kutir but by the time my turn came to speak to Him, He had to go and lead the knowledge series. As He was passing me by, He waited for a split second, smiled at me, patted my on my right bicep and then, left. So for the other thing, I knew He had blessed me even if neither of us said anything verbally.

Later that day, Saturday, the satsang in the Ashram was incredible. I have never smoked but if that wasn’t a high, I don’t know what is. Guruji’s talk was amazing. I had never heard Him speak the way He spoke. It was superb. The energy inside the meditation hall in the Ashram was immense. An hour on, it was breathtaking coming to terms with what I had experienced.

                               

The Saturday Satsang

As I was leaving the Ashram, getting ready to go back to Tallahassee, I knew what I was going to miss the most: the energy, the light if you want to call it. It was my first trip to the Boone Retreat Center in about two-and-a-half years and it was special because it made me reaffirm that there can be no place like Ashram. It’s a place where the positive energy lifts your energy by manifolds and you automatically start feeling happy. I am not joking when I say this: your happiness level is like you have won a national championship or a world cup, and you are that happy every moment.

The more I look back at the trip, the more I realize God’s grace. I mean meeting my friend in Miami was a miracle. You know, I was so happy to meet a fellow Art of Living volunteer that we actually did a satsang on the South Beach. I planning two trips within two weeks of one-another was a miracle. Meeting Guruji from so close was a miracle. Making so many friends on my trip was a miracle. Getting a ride back with the volunteers from West Palm was a miracle. Having an ‘Ashram love’ story like one I have every single time was a miracle. Missing my bus, but still getting back to Tallahassee by Sunday night was a miracle. I coming ‘home’ is a miracle.

During silence in Boston, it was like He had asked me if I would like to come back home and I replied, “Yes, Guruji.” 18 days on, now, I am truly home.

I don’t believe in miracles…I rely on them.

Jai Gurudev :)

Love,

Kratik

Home…well, I guess that’s what the Art of Living ashram in Bangalore does to you. I knew it was a home at the first instant; I don’t know how, I just knew it the moment when I saw the top of Vishalakshi Mantap (VM) from the taxi as I hit 21st km kanakapura road for the first time. In fact, from there on in, every time that I would make a trip to the ashram, seeing VM from the bus before entering the International center of the Art of Living would make my eyes wet. My heart would start pumping faster and I would feel like I am on the brink of something incredible. It felt like a wish was coming true and trust me, it happened every single time. It was amazing and something that I could never comprehend, but I guess that’s what happens when you are right outside of your home.

Ashram was a place where everyone was welcomed, accepted and celebrated, where every being was spiritual (and I am not talking about only humans), where everybody smiled for absolutely no reason, where the energy was so strong that you could rise in love with anybody at any time, and where it seemed like you already knew all the people whom you had just met. Time, space, energy, beings and their spirits, nature, universe and God…in the ashram, all those felt connected. It’s a connection that – probably – only silence and grace can make you experience and having not been in silence for over three years, at a personal level, I believe my connection with the self and the divine needs be strengthened again.

So, here I go again, wearing a huge smile on my face and singing Jai Gurudev! Over the years, Guruji and his knowledge has taken me to places. From my experience, one thing that I have learned is to trust the process and enjoy the journey.  You know, about three years ago, when I was a student at the Florida State University, I could never save enough money to afford an advance course. So, I took a sankalpa of doing an advance course once I save enough money and three years on…boom! Now that I have done that, it feels very special. Even though it’s my sixth and I won’t be doing it in the ashram, or going to the ashram doing satsangs in the train with hundreds of fellow volunteers, I believe this Art of Silence course it’s going to be the most special one yet. I just know it.

(Hult International Business School, Course Location)

Times are different, circumstances are different, I have even grown up a tad bit, but one thing still remains the same: the thought of me doing an advance course still makes me feel like there is magic in the air. I do feel it in my fingers and I absolutely feel it in my toes; Guru grace is all around me and the feeling grows…I feel like my spirit is dancing. It’s special, it’s magic and in Boston, I AM GOING HOME.

And then, I have come across people who are pleased, even though they don’t have as much as the people mentioned above. Who are these people? What do they do? They are the strong, independent and willing souls that have landed on this planet as a result of God’s creation, and in them they are heroes who not only smile, they in fact, conquer and from within, they conjure glory.

I was more like first ones.

Couple of years ago, round about this time year, I was working for probably the biggest sports analysis company in Asia as a soccer analyst, the world’s most read soccer website as a soccer journalist and the most well managed professional soccer club in India as a soccer marketer, but I can say, I am doing  better now. Working in marketing and sales, we had to sell tickets and get people for our soccer games. Having volunteered for almost three years as a social activist, I remember approaching this non-profit organization that took responsibility for teaching rural kids in India. As a club employee, I had these students come to the stadiums to watch our club games for free. It all worked out well and the kids made it in time for the East Bengal game, which in fact, was one of our first few games of the season.

The head personnel for the organization’s Pune branch, Arhaan, got about one hundred kids to the stadium and having spoken to my boss, I made sure that the kids made it to the sidelines as the players walked out for warm-up, only to be later seated in the VIP section. As the little rural children, who were dressed in their uniforms, got to the sidelines, their excitement was unbelievable. Some shook the hands of the players as they were walking out on to the fields, some shouted out their names and some whispered, “Hey, look at their leg muscles…oooh,” or, “This is the first time I have ever met a football player!”

As the game went on, they made the maximum noise and chanted the PFC theme, “Who are we? PFC!” It was great to see them have an experience of a life-time. The entire incident shook me and made me realize that it’s these moments that people remember. You are not going to remember if you ever failed in a test 36 years on, but what you will remember is meeting a football player who appears in the newspaper the very next day.

After the game, Arhaan thanked me and the club for everything we had done for their organization’s kids. As I was walking towards the parking, just seeing the look on each student’s face, I couldn’t stop smiling and later, I went to Arhaan and I asked him what I had resisted for a long time. I questioned, “So, are these kids really happy?” After which, he looked at me in confused manner and said, “You know, our kids are always happy, but today was definitely something special.”

They come to school because they love to and because they want to learn. They really love to learn. Unlike most kids, who are forced to go to school, they have an easier option: they can work in restaurants to support their family, but instead, they come to us because they want to learn. They too have big dreams.”

That moment was the moment when everything started to seem very different. Who were those kids? Well, they certainly are born in the richest of families. In fact, their families can’t even afford to pay for school, but they still go to schools because they want to learn and such non-profit organizations do a fantastic job in making sure that these kids get everything from books, to pens, to uniforms. Most of us are blessed enough to be born if upper/lower middle-class/rich families, but we are always not happy for something or the other, whereas, kids from lower financial backgrounds love everything that life gives them and their respect for it is insurmountable. It was a real eye-opener for me.

An year later, sometime in late-November/early-December, I was in Atlanta and visiting a homage for mentally infirm people. It was like being in Forest Gump or Koi Mil Gaya but only ten times of that. It was a scary but a very pleasant experience. Imagine yourself being surrounded by people who have been left at the centers by their families, who don’t know where they are at and why are they there, who don’t know what they are doing and on top of it, who have a misconception of who they are.

Maybe they live though a child in them or maybe they live their past over and over again…I don’t know, but one thing that could easily be inferred was the fact that they were all childlike and not childish. Their smiles, their joy, their excitement and their love for us was astonishing. I remember when one women from the mentally infirm home called me to her side and told me to stay safe, and also, blessed me to stay happy. I couldn’t believe it. In spirituality we talk of a ‘shift’, which refers to the shift in the thought process and it was exactly that. I don’t know what has happened to me since then. When I want to cry, I cry; when I want to laugh, I laugh, but I make sure that I celebrate life every moment like they do.

                                         

Those people…they were playful and joyful, (you talk of a girl dumping you, these people were dumped by their families to rotten) and also knew that life is difficult, but by then, they had also realized that every moment deserves to be celebrated. For me, it was even tough to imagine where they were and what each of them had gone through, but the startling thing about them was that they all were happy, and loved our company. It was a massive, massive shift for me.

You know, you must take a little time out of your lives and go and visit the homeless shelters because you must meet them. You must meet these people. They will teach you a lesson. Small worries of your life would disappear and dissolve, and like them, even if a little thing brings you happiness, you will celebrate it as if it is your salvation. Moreover, you will be grateful to God for what you have got.

In this post, I have talked of rural kids and mentally infirm people, but there are thousands out there waiting for you to visit them. Take your first foot forward. Visit these people, who live in this moment; that moment which passes as you snap your fingers. They aren’t the Jordons or Will Smiths of this world, but what they do, they turn into Morgan Freemans and Rajnikants because deep down they know, “Every single time that you are challenged, God wants you to come out as a hero.”

To me, I take my inspiration from these people: people who don’t have as much as others but their belief, strength faith and smile carries them past every single day.

"When you have done everything possible possible, He makes the impossible possible." – Dinesh Ghodke

Love,

Kratik