Just Me: The Kratik Malhotra Blog

All seemed lost when you called,
Craving for warmth deep beneath ice,
Analgesia of light in mid war, a move stalled,
A Barathea coat cover, pulled me away from apartheid.
A coin toss with both sides opposite,
On each, charming and smiling as I began to commemorate,
Out of the blue, two angels you sent,
Perfection in them, learnt a leonine stance as I heard them narrate.
They had experienced the art even missing in gerontology,
Angels had personalities, I never knew,
Your lozenge and a code to smile,
Handpicked they were, my teachers are.
The bank of creativity and the vision of beauty,
Touch of silence along with being strong academically,
Represents the country and moves the stage on her feat,
She taught me the art of doing everything, an angel she is.
With love and passion in his speech,
He shook me, took me by a storm like no other.
Having most dynamic personality that I had ever come across,
He taught me the art of celebrating every moment, an angel he is.
Away from this world they were, light up the candle with songs so rhyming,
Like an influx within me, their teachings your grace.
Logics turned out to be so illogical and heart so entwining,
Maybe I was extra special that you sent me two gems, when I was left in space.
I thank you for my smile,
As I left regret in the past within moments,
You flapped you hands and the door of happiness opened,
As you touched me, moved me, told me that I’m me,
Not a bondman but a prince, you whispered as you sent me the two angels,
Handpicked they were, my teachers are.
…………………………They say when it’s time your Guru finds you.
Jai Gurudev!
Dedicated to Srivi mam and Manish Bhaiya

India,a country that got it's independence more than 61 years back has come a long way into building what seems to be a powerful democracy.A country where more than 400 living languages are spoken,almost every religion(Christianity,Buddhism,Sikhism,Jainism,Hinduism,etc.) is followed,still maintains an equilibrium in the way that people live their lives.With diversity in food habits,clothing and attire and culture,India still maintains it's status as a developing country.

But it's been years and we still are developing.Okay,we are taking a step towards becoming a world superpower but what about it's rate.It's way too slow.At this pace,when will we be a superpower,I'll tell you,after a 1000 years,that too I'm not sure.They say,Mumbai is going to be like Manchester and Pune would be like Paris,you tell me now,is it possible in the next 1000 years.I certainly don't think so.With people not prepared to take up responsibility to change this nation,how are we going to succeed?

All of us have things that annoy us.For some,it's people who spit on the road,for ,for some it's people who throw garbage anywhere on the road,for some it's ones who pee anywhere etc..How many of us have actually taken up the responsibility to change what's happening around us.How many of us have gone to people and told them not to spit on the road,how many of us have said to ourselves that this country is my country and I'd fight against what's wrong.I'll tell you,negligible and the ones who have done that,are the ones who have at least left some kind of mark behind.

Don't tell me that the the tax that is paid to the government is not enough to build some decent toilets.I mean,if you use the toilets provided by the municipal co-operation and you'd probably have to cover you nose or hold your breath to pee before coming out.Taking an example of Q2P,a documentary film by Paromita Vohra,in that,the girls who go to municipality schools avoid drinking enough water during their school hours because they can't use the toilets.Is this right?

Where is the tax paid by us going,I'll tell you,into the pockets of the political leaders.We pay tax to the government to improve the civic amenities and but they are not doing that,are they?

Isn't this a time for change,change of the system,maybe?

The youth plays such an important role in our country.The youth would probably decide how this country would run and function in the next 100 years.I wrote about diversity of religion but that's it,right,what else.So many religions,but each one fights the other for some or the other reason.Forget about religion,what about OMS people attacked in Maharashtra,I don't oppose Raj Thackeray,I think what he is doing is right but they way he is carrying out his actions is wrong.The Indian youth is of 25-30 crore people.If each one,or even half of us,make up our mind and change our mindset to change the society,this country can reach new heights.

The things can't go on like they are going on now,the rules have to be changed.The responsibility has to be taken.With responsibility comes power and it's a spark that people around us need,to change what's happening now.Then,no 25 brain-washed idiots coming from some country via sea route can shock the entire country.It's for us to take the responsibility to change.

It's people who open the bus,car or train window and spit,who have to be stopped and it's we who can make the difference,the youth!

It's people who pee on the road,against a wall who have to be stopped because our county needs it.Take the responsibility to change and one day we all would say,"I have done something for the country,I have changed my country,I'm an Indian,a proud Indian!"

With movies like Rang De Basanti,Delhi-6(recently),we all say,this nation needs a change.As shown in Delhi-6,Hindus and Muslims fight for the most silliest reason of the lot,"is Kala Bandar a Hindu or a Muslim?"

Now tell me, is this country going to progress like this?

Do we need to fight against each other or live in peace and harmony with each other?

Don't we actually need to stand and speak whatever is happening in this country?

Start to take up responsibility,a responsibility to change this nation and make it into a nation having peace,no civil wars,clean roads,all the civic amenities and most importantly,good leadership.

It's we,the youth who can change this country,and I say becauseI can,I'm ready to take the responsibility.

I hope you all will stand by me too.

Jai Hind

It was 9Th grade when you first put your hand on that bud,
burning tobacco like you had heard.
First experience due to utter frustration,
then,second due to occasion.
Tobacco then,was to evade,
Weed then was to deluge.
Frequent and fearless,what you once hated,made it a habit,
From a one off,to occasional,to social,to regular,
I watched you lose you tarnish,you had every colour.
When once you laid,thinking how you used to be,
cried like insane and shrugged it off by another bud.
your perants found out but covered you with their love,
Delusion ed they were,gutted they felt.
you then decided to quit it all,
Day on,bullshit you said and hash was down your throat.
It all became a habit for you,
Demented and like an idiot,thinking powerful you laid,inept you were.
your perants not showing but couldn't shed tears,
Like a nut you said,depleted ones care.
Gutted they were and gutted who knew,
only years of God's gift left to be lived.
As I see you now lying in a coffin,
realizing how gutted you once used to be.
swayed like none other,
with a racid smell,feeling proud you walked down the road's end.
Seeing tears in your perants eyes,
Thinking how gutted they would be,
As I see you lie in a coffin,
I stand and think of us.
Where you were and how you had been,
time back had you realized,would you be here.
Gutted I stand,friend.

Always been a dreamer,
Spiritless I walked.
Wrapped in a shell like a creature,
In a misconception I lived,holding on to that very chord.
A belief that died one day,
moving on I knew,but soul crushed I was,I thought,
Alone I got down to lay,within emotions I was caught.
An attitude so vigilant,
It was all in your lane.
I a knife with edge so blunt,
All I was left was in vain.
you left but I still walked,
Feeling captivated,left me in tears.
I said I quit,with emotions rocked,
waiting till that cloud clears.
That's when I got my Guruji,
Introduced to me by my Guru.
His blessing and his connection with me,
A metronome of the divine with an amazing milieu.
He in my life like an angel,
I started to sing in his orchestra.
With a jubinated belief in him to ring his grace bell,
It seemed like the start of a new era.
Since then when I felt down,
He showed me the way.
Told me there's nothing to frown,
Giving my 100% to see that light ray.
How easily he taught me forgetting to rancour,
carving an attitude so valorous.
He showed me the path and made me discover,
a world of peace over evil,was to see,forgetting the previous.
A move from the past to the present,
the transition of thoughts after days so tumultuous.
A smile so constant after days of descend,
I realized how people had kicked me around with their opinions.
With a feeling of gratitude,
he made me stand right next to the stars.
Changed me to see this world in a way too different,
said accept situations the way the are.
All I did was believed in the master,
and left it all in the past.
With his teaching I learnt how opposite values are complementary,
how deterred I was,maybe I thought I had lost.
He came like a bird in my life,
dropping seeds of beatitude,whispered to be up to the stake.
From the clogne of beauty and an extra strive,
I learnt a reason is too week behined a mistake.
I walked on a road living under a shadow,
trapped in the prison of past.
He called me to give me a momento,
His teachings would always last.
That's my Guruji,
Introduced to me by my Guru.




Dedicated to Sri Sri Ravishankar,my Guruji.
Thanks a lot,Yes!+,Pune,AOL rocks!
A special thanks to Manish Bhaiya and Srividya didi.

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I am still hurting from a love I lost,
she was priceless and never wanted to lose her at any cost.
It had almost been an year,
and what had just come throush was my worst fear.
I said I have to wait,
and not be desperate.
But I have no idea from where on earth did this situation arise,
like a pheonix from the ashes,am I a fool to despise?
Time has never had answers for words left unsaid,
tears out of agony and depression,,leaves no more for them to shed.
I blame god to a certain extent,
He made to talk to her after seven years only for me to undergo a bend.
There are some who lie,
only to end up kissing their honey goodbye.
But I never even had to leave behind,a hurricane of some cruel lies.
Love is friendship on fire,
and she my lone desire.
When you have an entwinting heart,
and you have travelled in one of those love carts
even though deep inside u know ur a stringless bow,
but ur always prepared to take whats high and whats low.
the thought of moving away always bullied me,
i knew somewhere inside but I still did believe.
But as bulliness responds to strength,
I'd be prepared to be much stronger,
and try to move on even though I love her some much,
maybe I wasn't the most elite,
without her,I'm just incomplete.

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Seems as if I have lost hope,
But I'm not going into dope
I know I was never the best chap,
But a time there once was,That people for me would cheer and clap!
I know I have made mistakes one after the other,
from academic feild to music,life has been hard to steer.
I know my acts are ones I have to groom,
But how?, I have been wondering from midnight to noon.
I know world on me does laugh,
But just wanna say,DON'T WRITE ME OFF
There wasn't only one promise that I broke,
But I don't know infront of this world how do I cope?
Number of things I do lack,
Tell me how,with a bang can I be back.
I am walking on a road and noone to hear
It's as though this world has shut it's eyes and kickd me on the rear.
I know many might think I to them am not a boon,
But just wanna say it's way too soon.
I am young and there's a lot left to cough up,
So please don't write me off!

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A letter to God:
I was five when I first thaught of writing to you,
just to thank you for what you had given me.
But now is the time and you've always been true,
to have a cloud of grace over me and my family.
Even when the times have not been right,
You have given me enough power to face my worst sorrow,
and incase I am not able to fight,
sent me an angel for the agony to swallow.
It so seems that you controlled my life,
and made it go on in a way that was perfect and it's You whom I must greet.
You made me eat it's every slice,as though it was bitter at first but later sweet.
Given me friends via whoom You taught me One lesson after the other
and told me you must watch out otherwise u might have to surrender.
Surrounded me with people who would love,
and made me believe that they are the ones who are all above.
I again join my hand before You to pray,
To always have Your hand above me so that this life would go on the merry way.
I wish I could personally come and say thank You to You for all You have done for me,
but as for now I hope this letter reaches You.
Wish You in my life would forever be,
Just want to thank You so..

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Valentine's day,the day of love,
always thaught,this would be a day to look to the stars above,
and say,
I am with my love and the times all gay.
This day,this time again wasn't all that rare,
Still single,feels pathetic,I swear.
I love a girl,But her Love towards me is drowning in a deep well,
All the secrets and no one to tell.
When I use to see her face,I always wishd one day we would be
lost in each other's embrace,my darling and me.
I don't mind being patient and standing still to wait,
But will tell her how much I love her befor it's too late.
I've walkd long on this luv lane,but prefer to wait,
as I've seen desperation explode into flames .
I once loved her and still do,
She to me is like an arrow if I am a bow.
I'll never give up as I'm a fighter,
would try to make things brighter.
Her thaught still mesmerizes me,
can't get her out of my head,
I'll always stand by the things I've said.

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I thaught I'd never be able to live,When my brain told me I had lost in love.But I decided to carry on,When my heart told me..U DON'T LOVE TO WIN SOMEONE"S HEART,But you win HER heart through LUV.


ummmm.....Don't ask me why I am writing this as I mite be the last person to answer your question
Someone,sometime,somewhere told me Push the throttle completely and love the person u love to the fullest and then leave everything to the one having the most power,the one who has created us and wait to see what he has in store.
Well,why do people fall in love,why do people feel that without a person in your life,your life is incomplete,perhaps some questions that might always reman unanswered.......
OKay tell me have you loved anyone,if not,ur lying,If yes,why?
Is it because,u wanted that person close to u always,or is it that u care for a person or is it that u feel she touches your heart and soul or IS IT THAT YOU FALL IN LOVE FOR NO REASON(you dont know why,you dont know for what,all you know is your love is eternal and will last forever).
You don't fall in love to win someone's heart but you fall in love because you just love that person,I know many people might not agree with me but what if she does not love you,would you stop loving her,If you will,then that's not love.
But if not,and your heart says that a day in your life will come that your heart will say something to her's and you are ready to love her her till your last breadth and try to win her heart till your last gasp, then,you are in love buddy!
When I say "to love is not to win a heart",that entirely means you don't love a girl because you want to win her heart and want her to be yours but you just love her for a reason I am absolutely alien to,
You when fall in love dont give a damn about the circomstances and thr concequences because what you have with you is a feeling for someone and when that feeling is very strong,stronger than anything you have ever come across you know you are in love and even if she says no you dont take a step back as you love her and your love would last till you have lived your very last mili second.
Love teaches u to take pain,agony,joy,depression,sorrowness,shock(take it as a positive modal auxilry) in your stride and move on to get the girl of your dreams.
Even I am one of you who has loved some one at some time but am someone who thinks to be lost and far away from where I wanna be(in her heart),so,those who have got the girl of your dreams by your side,good for you but those who haven't would tell you to carry on and wait as love also has patience or rather it requires patience and do believe that if your love has strength even so for the creater to be proud of you ,a day will come that you would be with the one you love.

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You to me are like a vision in the dark,Will love you until there wouldn't remain a mark.I see you when I close my eyes as it's been time since I have met you,I hear your voice even when this world goes numb So do I love you..
Love is a feeling that evolves from inside without knowing a reason why.....?
Love for me is patience,sacrifice commitment,truth,friendship and deffo not physical attraction,though people confuse that with love,some think they are in love when it's only a crush and believe me this happens to almost 79 % people.
Love is patience..........Well,ummmm,when somthing is not going right between u and the one u love then it's u who has to wait and leave evrything to the one who created us to sort out stuff and see what he has in store.Not going right could be some misunderstanding,some hap hazard,some confusion,somethings that who shouldn't have said but u did,etc. and ya,it also could be losing touch,so,wait bcoz that's the key and have patience until everything is all right.well,even when everyting is all right,it's u who hhave to not spoil it and the most important thing is to be patient and wait for the right moment bcoz when u try to hurry u get a lot of things wrong.They do say right,Slow and steady wins the race.
Love is also sacrifice,actually,it is more or so sacrifice.u have to stand up to sacrifice for the one who love,it may even be crossing the limit(different for defferent people).IT's u who has to put yourself on the line and take most of the things on u incase of need,that could be saving her image from falling down,putting yourself first when she has to take a certain pain.WEll,sacrifice even means u have to leave(sacrifice) a lot of things for your love that could be giving up on an addiction or even do to an extent of lying.You must sacrifice when she needs it the most because you have to believe that there would be a day that she'd come to you love you for the person you are,she might close her eyes when she tries to figure out who is the one for her and then only see you.
Love is also committment,one of the most important aspects.Your commitment matters the most,the one you love should mean more than anything that exists on this holy planet.You should be committed towards her till your last breadth.It shouldn't be that in a dark hour,you forget her and try to move on with your life alone or try goining around with anyone.You once are committed should be such that you are ready to walk over burnt coal for her,you got to be ready to walk the wire for her.She should be your first priority always and not you latter.Don't you wanna say your love is ETERNal.......?
This might sound to some of you as very quoxotic but love for me is also truth,if you can't speak the truth to her then you probably don't love her.Even if you have lied to the world about something it's you who has to tell her the truth,,no matter how bitter it is,if she understands you,she will understand the reason for the lie.You can't go on lying to her cause if you do,your love/relationship(if you do have one) basicaly becomes such a setup and that is because she loves you for the person she think you are but you are not.If your love has enough truth go on and say whatever is true and never lie thats when you two will be considered in the same range as Romeo and Julliet,Laila and majnu,etc.
Love,I'd even like to call it friendship because if the one you love can't be your bestest friend then you can't be in love or you cant have a ralationship coming through.In love understanding is very important and understanding will take pace and reach it's peak when you two are the best friends.She should be someone whom you should always share everything with,something like you dol with your best friend.You should always help her in her problems and when the time's not going right for her.She should feel from inside that you are the person whom she wants to talk to when she is getting bored,when she is over-joyed,when she is happy or even in case of saddness.Inshort she should feel that you are her best friend and the one who understands her the most and wants to be with all her life.
Well,for those of you who believe in love at first site,I think you people are very wrng.For those who do,wouldn't that be a crush then.Otherwise,whats the difference between love and a crush.Dude,when you fall in love,it takes hell lot of things,patince commitment sacrifice even friendship.When you see anyone how can you say you are in love?
I mean what would that person wants you to change,completely for her to be yours,What if she is into cigarretes,alcohol and drugs,you definately don't figure that out by physical attraction.Let me tell you I would never change for the girl whom I love,though I would sacrifice,and do a lot of other things but not change and deffo not accept a girl who does stuff that is against my morals and principles.To love you have to understand and not get physically attracted.
When I hear someone's voice,I feel I am completely lost and would be almost immpossible to come out of my dreams.When I think about someone,I can't stop thinking,the days might pass,the nights might not stop and pass away without waiting for me to breath,cause I can't stop thinking.......cause I love you
Well,this is what love means to me,I hope you appreciate my veiws,thanks for reading.

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Well,this is me,Kratik Malhotra.
TIME FOR A FLASH BACK.........Ta ta da....
I studied in this school called Choithram School Indore for like eight years(jr. montessori to 6th standard.Well,this school is high in richness and infrastructure.
I remember......looooooong time back.......It's been like 8 years now and the memories still as fresh like it was yesterday.School life cpmpletely rocks.I remember waiting for the bus early morning and then reaching the school via bus,going to the classroom to keep my bag and then goin for the prayer at 9(I guess),prayer followed by the national anthem,that was just okay but the horror use to begin when we the periods use to start.Before that we use to go to our classes height wise,with the school uniform check and our shoes had to be polished,my shoes sometimes wern't whitend,so I had to run around that never ending school ground,it was so tiring,actually,tiring aint even a word.....it was killing.
Oh ya and what about the attendance,the teacher use to be like,Komal....(she use to say yes)n then my number.......Kratik.....and I in my own world never realizing it only,then my partner use to tell me "Kratik,you missed your roll call."Each of my classmates alerting me in a very sarcastic way,then the teacher use to be like,"Kratik Malhotra,is he present(shouting)"? and I use to be like,"Ye-es ma'am",she use to yell at me saying"So rahe they kiya ?" and then th whole class use to laugh,was embarrasing,okay,forget about the embarrasement,what about the impression,it'd go down like hell and I am not talking about the impression on the teacher but impression on the girls in the class,I didn't give a damn about the teacher impression.This happened to me a lot in the third standard and the teacher I presume was Sanjanhar mam.But before that we use to sit a boy and a girl on a bench.There was this girl who was my partner(bench mate) in te second standard,oh! I had such a crush on her,she was so pretty,I was so lucky to sit with her for whatever time we sat together but as they say all the gd thing have to come to an nd,and our sitting together did,and she was moved next to Rohan Jain,good at sports but I hated him,bloody rabbit(used to be a very fast runner).
Great start to the day isn't it.....what could be worse....but as I use to think that mam was like submit your homework copies and open the workbook,I use to have this grin on my face and think there mite be many who mite not have got the workbook and done the homework.I use to take out my book and smile and look at peopl who hadn't gt there's.I then use to look into my bag searching for my homework copy but it would never be there.I use to searchc and seach for my copy but I just wouldn't get it,then I would remember mummi calling me"Anshuuuuuu,Anshu,come and have breakfast,aur bag leke aana."I use to go running thinking that if I dont have breakfast early I'd miss the bus and ususual forgetting the book.But as I regular I use to have a million reasons for not doing the homework but my reasons wouldn't work infront of the teacher,and as a corollory the teacher use to tell me get out of the class!But I use to feel releaved as I had a bunch of classmates to accompany me.I use to think,who am I,am deffo not a stupid idiot who keeps on failing,I pass and get 70 or so percent,so I am an above average student not some damn sissy!.....What could get worse.....a hurrendous day,thats surely the end of all the agony......but NO suman mam,the head of the jr wing,primary section is on round......OH SHIT.....now thats trouble!
But she would nt be on any sort of "a round",people would just lie to have a Cat among the pigeons.It'd all just end okay and I would be back in the class for the next lecture,next lecture which turns out to be the most hated one,HINDI,taught by Neera ma'am.I can't say I hated her but I deffo hated the subject.I had some rreal respect for her but never liked her for some reason,she was always behined me to sue me for some or the other reason.The lecture begins,she comes reads out a chapter for the first fifteen minutes and then fills up the whole black board writing in the most difficult script.I used to pay attention for the first five minutes while she read and then everything would go above my head,I would almost sleep by the time she would finish reading the chapter.Now,you tell me how can anyone write in so much thats written on the board after that,so I never use to(haha).I use to write the first few lines and that too so slow till the period would get over and the period got over and the next teacher came in,use to tell her that I have written the wholw thing on the board(while the whole class use to keep on writing) and gently remove my book and start to read or I rater say pretend to read(haha).
The rest of the lectures would go fine before the break,then comes the break,I say okay lunch,thank god no more studies alteast for the next hour,hooh!,there could be nothing worse!Lucnh,whats been made,oh! methi! I hate it!Lets see if I can escape without eating by leaving thr methi in the plate and keeping the plate in the basin,a huge basin down stairs but that would never happen,my whole lunch break would get done properly as I wouldn't even get a chance to go out and play those games that we use to play,"hide and seak","chor-police" and stuff.The bell would ring and I would still not finish but how could I!,me and methi,never!The rest of the day would be okay with a bit of stuff obviously goining wrong,but in all I would end a day in school as a misery but that'd not end my atrocious day rite,I would reach home,badi mumi(my grandmother) would give me food and I would spend my time watching TV and playing my videogame,then give my mother calls for her to come home from work an hour before she was supposed to,I would then wait and wait and she use to step in,I'd give her one huge hug.I use to feel now I definately have ended my mesiery time for the day.She'd see my notebooks and then I would just know that there's more agony!Hindi,written nothing in the notebook,and then she use to call up Nivedita(a girl who lived quite close to my house) and ask for her hindi notebook,that was so embarrasing,but it was a neccesity.She would come with her dad and I would copy the whole thing in my notebook,and then I'd feel so tired,eat my dinner and go to sleep.
That would be one of my days in school,my days in my first school, choithram, have been a lot tougher than my days in APS but I still loved choithram so much!This was me mentioning just one of those days but let me tell you,there have been days that have been a lot worse,but its important to forget all that and to remember days that have been good!Thus,I say days in school or a single day in school they all are the same but I love them.
-Kratik Malhotra